We Can Do More Than Survive, We Can THRIVE!

The past several years have been challenging, but we survived. Political chaos and COVID-19 interrupted our normal routines and caused many of us to put our lives on hold. This is still a relatively new year, and we can do more than survive.  It’s time we take back control of our lives and THRIVE.  Although not always an easy thing to do, we must seek to find peace of mind and fulfilment in all that we strive to do.  To THRIVE means different things to different people. For me, I THRIVE when I experience success in the pursuit of my dreams, goals, and aspirations and complete whatever I start.  Others may view THRIVE as finding balance and stability in their mental, physical, social, and spiritual development.  There are also people who equate their ability to THRIVE to the attainment of material possessions.  No matter how one gauges their effectiveness to THRIVE, it comes down to having the right mindset.  I would like to offer that it can be difficult to find peace of mind and fulfilment without a sense of emotional stability, personal accomplishment, productiveness, and gratitude in your life.

Emotional Stability

Emotional stability plays an important role in our ability to THRIVE.  We must control our thoughts and emotions.  The act of living brings many twist and turns, but we must keep moving forward.  In the story Fences, the character Troy, a former baseball pitcher, would say, “you have to take the crooked with the straight and keep swinging.”  We cannot afford to allow negative thoughts to dominate our thinking. We can eliminate negative thoughts by changing our perspective of the situation.  Negative thoughts often arise from deeply held beliefs that trigger certain reactions in us. An unforeseen incident or event can turn our world upside down, if left unchecked.  The loss of a loved one, illness, job loss, or failed relationship can bring on a  sense of hopelessness and despair. Its normal to react to these unexpected situations because of how they make us feel, but we must not allow them to control us.  Failure to control our thoughts only empowers external forces to determine our responses to the situation.  We have the power to overcome negative situations by controlling our thoughts. Ask yourself what is the lesson to be learned or the assignment to be carry out.

 Accomplishment

It is difficult to THRIVE if you sit around and allow the world to pass you by.   We must work towards the accomplishment of our desired goals every day.  We must set realistic goals that are doable and achievable within a set timeframe.  The successful accomplishment of at least one task each day will bring you closer to whatever you desire.  Remember as the old saying goes, “Don’t put off for tomorrow that which can be done today.”  No matter how we feel, we must get up and do something every day.  The feeling of success from achieving a small thing will do wonders to motivate you keep you going forward to achieve bigger things.  This requires us to live each day with purpose and intent.  Do a little bit here and a little bit there, before you know it, you will have accomplished a lot.  The successful achievement of each goal will bring a great feeling of accomplishment and self-worth.  The more we accomplish, the more we  will believe in our ability to get things done. 

Productiveness

To THRIVE requires us to use our time wisely.  We cannot blame our failure to get things done on lack of time.  We all have 24 hours a day, 168 hours a week, 720 hours a month, and 8,760 hours a year to get things done. How we spend our time will have a major impact on how we live. The people who make the best use of their time are far more likely to find success in whatever they do.  Remember, nothing from nothing gives nothing.  We must put in the time and effort if we expect something in return.  I believe they call it work.  We must avoid engaging in self-destructive behavior.  It’s okay to have fun but too much fun is counter productive.  We must maintain balance in use of our time.  This requires a great amount of self-discipline and focus.  Don’t be distracted by opportunities that seem too good to be true.  There are no short cuts to success.    It is critical that we use our time effectively to be as productive as possible 24/7. 

 Gratitude

The expression of gratitude is the foundation in our quest to THRIVE.  There is something to be grateful for every day of our lives.  It’s easy to focus on what seems to be going wrong or what we wish we had.  We must be thankful for the opportunities that enable us to learn and grow, and the support we receive from others.  We must also show an appreciation for what has happened or is happening in our lives, whether big or small, good or bad.  It is important that we find pleasure in every step along the journey to reach our full potential.  A simple expression of gratitude enables us to keep a positive outlook no matter the outcome.  Gratitude can also help us stay focused during the most difficult of times.  Life is not always going to be easy, but with the right attitude we have a chance to succeed at achieving our goals.  We should start each day with a spirit of gratitude for another opportunity to participate in the arena of life.

This is your year to THRIVE.  Forget about what happened or did not happen over the past several years.  Use the time and upcoming months to create the life you desire.  Remember this anonymous saying, “Our eyes are in front because it’s better to look ahead than to look back.  Don’t dwell on negative situations from the past.  Learn from them and keep moving forward.” 

THRIVE!

Written by Dr. RL Kight for Mind Power Solutions.  Visit www.mindpowersolutions.com to learn more about our personal development and training services.

5 Things You Can Do to Become a Better You in 2022

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 As 2021 comes to an end, you are probably wondering what you could have done to be a better you. Don’t feel bad, most of us are asking that same question. Unfortunately, you can’t do much about what occurred or didn’t occur this past year.  However, the new year brings brand-new opportunities for self-improvement. I would like to offer 5 suggestions that you might want to consider on your quest to become a better you in 2022.  

 1. Be Intentional About Your Goals 

You cannot improve at anything you do unless you set new goals and achieve them. Successful people understand that you can never be too good at what you do or too successful. You should focus on goals that can take your game to the next level. Strive to do things that you have never done before. Pursue goals that will force you to move beyond your comfort zone to surpass last year’s accomplishments or setbacks.  

 2. Seek to Expand Your Networks 

None of us can get to where we want to be alone. It pays to surround yourself with a network of people who know things that you do not know. Seek and listen to their expert advice, analyze it, and then implement it if it makes sense. Do not rely on your knowledge base alone in everything you do because you cannot know everything. Evaluate your network to determine if you have the right people to help you accomplish what you are trying to get done.  Connect with other doers in your network because they will keep you inspired to get things done.  

 3. Be Responsible for Your Success  

Take full responsibility for your actions and learn from your challenges then move on. It’s difficult to experience success if you do not accept responsibility for your actions even if it is just in private. Otherwise, you will never learn from your mistakes. Don’t blame others for your failures or shortcomings. Learn from your mistakes, so you can take corrective action and possibly prevent them in the future. Don’t allow yourself to get stuck on one idea or decision that didn’t turn out the way you planned. Analyze the situation, plan a new course of action, and continue the journey to achieve your desired goals.

 4. Make Time for Family and Friends

Family and friends help to create balance in your life. Value these relationships because they often prevent you from feeling alone on the journey.  They may give you a different perspective that can help you accomplish what you are striving for. Family and friends can reenergize and keep you motivated to continue your quest for success. Enjoy the fun and laughter to avoid fatigue and burn out as you strive to become a better you. 

 5. Nurture your Body, Mind, and Spirit

You cannot be successful if your body is unable to handle the pressure that comes with working hard. You must keep it healthy with exercise and a healthy diet. You also must have a sound mind for you to make the right decisions at the right time. Therefore, you must limit the amount of stress that you endure. Finally, you must be in good spirit for you to think clearly. You also cannot enjoy life or interact with others positively if you are in a bad mood persistently. Take care of yourself so that you can succeed on the quest to be the best you.

 As the new year begins, make the commitment to be the best you in 2022.  You have all you need to succeed.  Let’s get it done!

 Happy New Year!

Eliminating Negativity from Your Life in 2021

Despite the ups and downs of 2020, we have the power to leave the negative experiences behind us.  As you embark on the year 2021, there is no reason to allow past or unforeseen negativity to dominate your life. This is a new year with unlimited possibilities.  In order to take advantage of this new beginning, you must make a concerted effort to avoid negative situations as much as possible and reduce its impact to an absolute minimum.  Negativity can be a drain on your mental and spiritual well-being.  So, what can you do to minimize negativity that is likely to drain your energy and create stress and anxiety?  Here are some tips to remove yourself from negativity.

 Express gratitude

Gratitude is a powerful tool against negativity.  Placing an emphasis on gratitude allows you to find the good within every situation. It helps you to adopt a mindset that no matter how bad things are, there is a positive lesson to be learned from the experience. This type of thinking prevents you from being overcome by negative experiences.  It empowers you to control your emotions.

Try saying "thank you" for all that’s going right in your life no matter small or big.  Also, be thankful for the strength to confront the negative experiences and/or challenges you face.  Express gratitude for the ability to take on the problems you face to reduce the effect on your emotions.  Although good to say “thank you” out loud, it doesn’t hurt to often say it in your head.

If possible, keep a gratitude log and write down at least three things that have happened during the day that you're grateful for.  You’re likely to have many more experiences to be thankful for than disappointments.

Participate in exercise and physical fitness activities

Daily exercise and physical fitness activities can be a game-changer in reducing negativity from your life.  They release endorphins into your body. 

These are a natural "feel good" mechanism that acts faster, better, and safer than any drug (prescription or otherwise) to make you experience happiness, and they are generated when you exercise. 

Regular exercise has been proven to reduce stress, fight off signs of anxiety and feelings of depression. At the same time, regular exercise and physical fitness will do wonders for boosting your self-esteem and self-confidence.

You have a total of 168 hours in a week.  I encourage you to dedicate just at least 10 hours a week to exercise and physical fitness.  Make this an integral part of your daily routine.  It doesn’t matter your age or current fitness level.  Discuss with your physician and participate in activities that work best for you.

Eat healthier

Make healthier choices when you eat - even if that means changing your food selection.  A good place to start is to not eat things where you don't understand the ingredients.  Work to eliminate foods with high fructose corn syrup, preservatives, and/or artificial flavors from your diet. What you eat has a significant impact on the body’s ability to effectively handle stress and anxiety.

Be aware of so-called comfort foods. They are often anything but comforting.  It may be something you eat that gives you a quick sugar high, but that's soon followed by the negative side of eating food that's not exactly healthy.  Cut down on excess sugar.  Gradually cut down on the caffeine (it's not a good idea to remove caffeine from your diet all at once).

Eating foods such as fish, fruits, green vegetables, nuts, and grains will make a significant difference in the body’s ability to minimize stress and anxiety.  You are what you eat.

Rid yourself of negative conversations

Stop the negative talk with yourself.  Sometimes we spend the entire day telling ourselves how bad things are going for us.  This negative self-talk only adds to our level of frustration.  Language such as “I’m struggling”, “having a bad day” or “nothing ever goes right for me” are all examples of negative conversations that drain us our mental powers and ability to be proactive.

Don’t waste time talking to or with people who only want to engage in negativity.  They never have a word of encouragement or appreciation of the positivity in you or the world.  Their frame of reference is always a negative circumstance.  Shift the conversation to a more positive discussion about some act of kindness, and experience when you were at the top of your game, or remove yourself from the discussion.

Surround yourself with people who are strong mentally.  The conversation is about reaching the next level and continuous improvement.  It’s about discussing solutions and new ideas to make a difference in your life.

Stop reliving past negative experiences over in your head

Negativity isn't something you've chosen to do.  It's something your subconscious mind has developed as a protection process for you.  Just as you can't tell your hair to stop growing - it's not easy to remove negativity or depression at a conscious level.  It must be done at the subconscious level in order to create a new you.

You are what you think.  So, reprograming your thoughts will help to alter your subconscious mind to delicately change your behavior and reduce the negativity in your life. You can reprogram your thoughts daily.  Acknowledge negative thoughts from past experiences and immediately begin to think of better times.  Celebrate events when you were at the top of your game and overcame negative situations in your life.

Remember, there is no space for negativity in your life in 2021.  Take control of your thoughts and become the person you aspire to be.

Written by Dr. RL Kight for Mind Power Solutions.  Visit www.mindpowersolutions.com to learn more about our personal development and training services.

Move from a Fixed Mindset to a Growth Mindset

There are many books available today offering advice on the importance of having the right mindset. Most discussions conclude that one’s mindset has a significant impact on an individual’s ability to reach his/her full potential.  The mindset shapes the way we behave and make decisions no matter the situation in our daily lives. Of all the discussion on mindset, it appears that none more impactful on human behavior than having a fixed mindset or a growth mindset.  These two types of mindsets determine our capacity to keep moving forward or remain at a standstill in life.  Individuals who tend to lean towards the status quo are more likely to have a fixed mindset.  Those who lean towards embracing change tend to have a growth mindset.  If you find yourself stuck in a rut, perhaps you have become the victim of a fixed mindset. However, it’s not too late to make the transition from a fixed to a growth mindset to embrace the necessary changes to live a more fulfilled life.  This week’s article offers some suggestions on how to transition from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset.

Difference Between a Fixed Mindset and Growth Mindset

The terms fixed mindset and growth mindset are not new. They originated over 30 years ago by Carol Dweck, a professor at Stanford University.  She led a 10- year study to assess why some people succeed and others fall short of living up to their potential.  She concluded that it came down to people having a fixed or growth mindset towards the willingness or unwillingness to take on new situations.  The study concluded that these two types of mindsets significantly impacted the participant’s behavior and response to new challenges.  She discovered that some of the brightest participants were unwilling to take chances or venture into new experiences if the outcome for success was uncertain.  While others were willing to risk failure or to embrace their shortcomings and push forward regardless of the possible outcome.

 In a fixed mindset, people believe their abilities are as good as they are going to get and therefore cannot be improved. In other words, you either have what it takes to succeed, or you don’t, and there is nothing you can do about it.  These people all too often rely on their existing knowledge base and talents rather than working to develop and improve. They also believe that talent alone leads to success, and effort is not required.

On the other hand, in a growth mindset, people have an underlying belief that their knowledge base and skill level can grow with time and experience. These people believe they can become smarter, they realize that an investment of time and effort can have an effect on their success, so they put in extra time, leading to higher achievement.

 We are living in unprecedented times with unthinkable diversity, technological advancements, a global economy, and highly competitive society.  Most work now commands people who can utilize technology and demonstrate emotional intelligence.  The workplace is seeking people who are: lifelong learners; critical thinkers; willing to try new things; and able to adapt to a world of constant change. Unfortunately, individuals who are unable to adapt to this ever-challenging global society with a fixed mindset are likely to find themselves non-competitive and unable to live up to their full potential.  

Significance of a Growth Mindset

You may think of yourself as brilliant, intelligent, talented, highly skilled, and still find yourself locked out of society.  To move forward one must be willing to embrace change and challenge themselves to stretch and grow.  As such, you must be willing to take risks even if you don’t think the time is right.  These times require uncompromising self-confidence and a willingness to learn new ways of doing things.  Nothing proves this more than the impact of the COVID-19 Pandemic.  This pandemic over the past 9 months has turned the workplace inside out.  It caused all of us to adjust and get work done in new ways.  It has literally reshaped the workplace as we once knew it.  Most of us now find ourselves working from home, participating in numerous virtual meetings while trying to balance lifework to maintain some sense of normalcy.  It requires a certain type of mindset in order to successfully make the adjustment to this new hybrid home-workplace.  In order to remain relevant in today’s workplace, you must be receptive to adopting a growth mindset. 

Key Features to developing a growth mindset.

Going from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset is not an easy task.  It’s very unlikely to happen overnight.  However, there are several actions that one can take to help transition from a fixed mindset to a growth mindset.  These suggestions should not be taken as all-inclusive.  However, they should be viewed as ways to challenge your current thought process.   

·       Accept your Imperfections – be willing to accept your imperfections and don’t spend a lot of time seeking to be perfect.  Even people who are good at most things are not perfect. 

 ·       Change your Perceptions – be mindful of false perceptions that mistakes or missed opportunities are final. View setbacks and challenges as opportunities to learn and grow.  Ask yourself, “what is the lesson here?”.

 ·       Strive for Continuous Improvement – set a goal to learn something new daily whether you need it not.  You are unconsciously building skills and storing information that you may need later. 

 ·       Eliminate the Need for External Encouragement – avoid staying stuck in the same old situation because of fear that others might not support you. Get over being afraid of looking foolish or viewed as incompetent for trying something different or new and it doesn’t work out.

 ·       Appreciate the Journey – it’s all about the experience gained, lessons learned, and the memories of taking action to become a better you.  Search for the enjoyment in what you are doing and allow the end to evolve.

 ·      Understand your Purpose – readily accept that you have a unique purpose that inspires and motivates you from within. It helps to align what you are doing with your purpose.

 ·       Embrace your Growth – working to adopt a new mindset is not an overnight process.  So, don’t expect the transition to happen all at once.  Celebrate each small success that you experience.

 ·       Consistently set new Goals – the pursuit of goals tends to stimulate ongoing learning. It also keeps you engaged in the process of growth and development of your skills and abilities.

 ·       Be Realistic – avoid letting a small mistake or setback to create a climate of gloom and doom.  In other words, you tried something, and it didn’t work out, but it’s not the end of the world.  Accept it for what it is and move on. 

 Benefits of Adopting a Growth Mindset. 

There are some personal rewards should you decide to develop a growth mindset.  People with a growth mindset tend to: 

·       Enjoy life more – experience less stressed because of the lack of fear of failure.  Relish the opportunity to learn new things.  They accept their current level of success as they work to become better in order to do their best.

 ·       Experience Higher Self-esteem and Self-confidence – feel good about what they can accomplish and get done.  Even when something doesn’t turn out the way they desired, they have the confidence to know they can and will do better.

 ·       Practice Acceptance – readily accept their mistakes and those of others.  This makes it easier to forgive and believe that folks will do better.

 ·       Have a Realistic Perception of Reality – enjoy life without putting a lot of unnecessary pressure on themselves.  They accept that there is no perfect situation or world.  They often live stress freer lives.

 ·       Display Increased Resilience – find it easy to bounce back from setbacks because it’s viewed as a learning experience.  They understand that things don’t always work out the way they plan them, but they remain focused on the ultimate outcome.

 ·       Regard Setbacks as Useful Lessons – don’t beat themselves up or stay stuck in the past. They embrace the lesson learned from the experience and move on.

 ·       Enjoy Learning – find value in learning the process of things and adapting to new conditions.  Interested in understanding how they can do better and engage themselves in learning.

 Most of us have either a growth mindset or fixed mindset which is driven by our belief system.  The combination of thoughts and beliefs determine our behavior.  Our external behavior is a reflection of internal thoughts often shaped by one’s attitude towards a given situation.  We all know people who appear to be stuck in time, reliving past situations in which they no longer want to be. They believe they are going nowhere, and/or their future opportunities are somewhat limited.  As a result, they follow the same routine day after day.   On the other hand, we also know other people who were able to overcome unbelievable odds and excel to the highest heights of their professions. I encourage you to embrace a growth mindset to become the best you. 

Written by Dr. RL Kight for Mind Power Solutions.  Visit www.mindpowersolutions.com to learn more about our personal development and training services.

Power to Overcome Self-Doubt

Self-doubt is something we all experience at one time or another in coping with the challenges of everyday life or confronted with new opportunities. It sometimes presents itself as a sense of feeling unprepared, unworthy, or even unqualified to take on the challenge before us. In most instances, we are able to overlook these moments of self-doubt and deal with the issue at hand. However, self-doubt becomes a problem when it begins to destroy our self-confidence, cripple creativity, and limits our willingness to accept new opportunities. If left unchecked it will bring the best of us down or prevent us from living up to our full potential.

Here are three suggestions to enhance your ability to overcome self-doubt:

1) Rid Yourself of Fear to Make Mistakes

Self-doubt is often grounded in fear of the unknown. Fear that we will make a mistake or do something wrong.  It is often fear of how we will be perceived by others if we fall short of their expectations. You will never become all that you can be if you remain afraid to make a mistake. Life doesn’t require us to be perfect and mistakes are stepping stones to learning.  So, don't allow mistakes to make you feel less than, rather, let them be your teacher. Successful people recover from their mistakes and become more stronger and successful than before. However, it requires a certain mindset to embrace mistakes as tools for success. It requires that you adopt a growth mindset.  People with a growth mindset are not afraid of mistakes.  In fact, they embrace mistakes as part of the learning process for personal growth and development.  These individuals tend to see mistakes as opportunities for improvement.  They openly take chances to pursue their goals no matter the failures they experience.  Lewis Alerson author of Growth Mindset suggests that folks with a growth mindset tend to believe that perfection is not a requirement for success and accept that they are allowed to make mistakes.  You will never grow unless you are willing to take risks. 

2) Take Control of your Emotions 

Uncontrolled emotions leads to unnecessary worry, frustration, anger, and self-doubt which impede our ability to make sound decisions.  This hinders our capacity to do things in our own best interest. We spend a lot of time second-guessing ourselves and seeking validation from others. We tend to delay taking action until circumstances force us to do so. As a result, we sell ourselves short and are forced to accept less than we deserve. Feelings of self-doubt are often driven by uncertainty of the unknown which makes it easy to stay within our comfort zone. Uncontrolled emotions will severely limit your ability to move forward in life if you allow them to.  To overcome emotional feelings of self-doubt, you must recognize when they they occur and understand that you have the ability to rise above them. Unfortunately, not enough of us are in touch with our emotions and have no idea why we feel the way that we do.  Here is where emotional intelligence, as it relates to self-awareness, is so vital to our ability to overcome feelings that stifle our growth and development. According to James Williams, emotionally intelligent people tend to acknowledge and process their feelings as they occur, instead of allowing them to build up.  They are more likely to deal with their current feelings about a situation and let them go.  Emotionally intelligent people are also able to shift their mindset and move on regardless of how they feel.  You too must go forward and do whatever you need to get done regardless of the feeling of self-doubt.  Emotional feelings can be very strong, and it is not always easy to pull away from them.  But, to be able to take your game to the next level you must behave contrary to these feelings of doubt.  Otherwise, they will continue to dictate your life and hold you in bondage.

3) Develop Mental Toughness

Always bet on yourself to deliver the goods. Bear in mind that, in any situation, you could either fail or succeed. So why not be optimistic about your ability to reach success.  It requires a certain level of mental toughness to keep pushing forward when things don’t seem to be going your way.  Mental toughness will give you the internal strength to take on any obstacle or challenge and to remain focused on your goal.  People with mental toughness don’t allow themselves to become distracted and go off course.  In the book Mental Toughness, Thomas Turner advocates that mentally tough people tend to believe that as long as they keep trying, they will succeed. Failure is never an option for them.  They always look for positive outcomes no matter their struggles and circumstances.  Purposefully lean towards the positive side of every situation.  It’s as simple as looking at the glass of water as half full instead of half empty.

The power to overcome self-doubt begins with you.  You must believe that you can achieve your destiny despite what other people say or society expects from you. Do not allow circumstances to dictate what you can achieve in life. Perhaps you had several bad breaks in life and negative messages were pumped into your head to promote self-doubt since you were a child, you now have the chance to turn it around. If you desire to fulfill your dreams, let go of self-doubt and move through the world with uncompromising confidence and will power.

Written by Dr. RL Kight for Mind Power Solutions.  Visit www.mindpowersolutions.com to learn more about our personal development and training services.